


The Ghost of Valentine's Past

by lureavi



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Adam is a ghost to be clear, Adam is incredibly sassy and bitter, Angst with a Happy Ending, But at least he was dropping some serious hints, But he's trying to help, Canon Compliant, Ex-boyfriends getting closure, Gay Disaster Shiro (Voltron), Ghosts, Ghosts of Christmas, I know this is strange, M/M, Matt wasn't much better, Outside of Curtis not being there, Post-Canon, Sorry baby as much as I love you you did not fit into this story, This is the Weirdest Idea for a Valentines story, on Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-02-15
Packaged: 2019-10-28 18:16:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17792327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lureavi/pseuds/lureavi
Summary: Valentine's day is coming up, and Shiro has been crushing on Matt from afar for far too long. But, he just can’t work up the courage to do anything about it, and decides instead to shun every aspect of Valentines day. So, of course, the night before the big day, Shiro retires to his room, ready to wait it out like the Valentine’s scrooge he is.Which is when he sees Adam, the ghost of Valentine’s past, ready to Christmas Carol his dumb ass in the right direction.(NO DESCRIBED CHARACTER DEATH! Adam is just. A ghost.)





	The Ghost of Valentine's Past

**Author's Note:**

> Haha! I got this done just in Valen-time! I've been seeing too many supernatural/spooky AUs going around, and I got the weirdest idea for this fic a few days ago, and I was damn determined to have it done before the end of today! Hope y'all like it!

He appeared to be lost in his work, his face buried in the dim glow of screen after screen, but it had been too long since he’d read a single word. Instead, Shiro used the translucent orange pad as window to gaze wistfully through. Through to the opposite side of the lounge, where a certain auburn-haired rebel was fielding compliment after compliment on his recently chopped hair, or on the slim-fitting uniform that had replaced his battle-worn armor. Shiro’s fingers tightened on his pad as he watched a blushing officer place a pink, heart-shaped box into Matt’s hands. Since he had taken up residence in the lounge an hour earlier, that was the third Valentine’s gift Shiro has watched Matt receive. That made three people who evidently possessed far more courage than himself. He, who couldn’t bring himself to even broach the topic of his years-long crush, let alone go so far as to publicly display it and risk the rejection of a lifetime by his oldest friend. Instead, he watched, trying desperately to gauge Matt’s reaction to each gift, each gracious smile and flush making dread wrap tighter around his heart, which already felt like cracking glass. Valentine’s day, he firmly decided, was the absolute worst holiday in the known universe, and he hadn’t a clue how he was going to make it through tomorrow.

After thanking his latest admirer, Matt gathered up the small pile of candies and flowers he’d acquired, and hauled them over to the chair Shiro had made himself at home on. He plopped down onto the armrest, the various plastic packaging in his arms crinkling loudly, “Man, I freaking love Valentines day!” He cheered, and plucked a pearly white carnation from one of the two bouquets he’d received. Gently, he tucked it behind Shiro’s ear, “where’s your pile of gifts, cap?”

The flutter of Shiro’s heart at the gesture was a welcome change to the jealousy he’d been stewing in, but it wasn’t quite enough to haul him out of his pessimistic mood. “Shoved aside where I don’t have to look at them,” He grumbled. He was sure that, just like the days prior, a variety of gifts would be sat upon the welcome mat outside his cabin door. So far he’d accumulated a dozen boxes of chocolate he wouldn’t eat, piled up a good few letters from a  _ secret admirer _ that he couldn’t bring himself to read, and taken the time to sneak armfuls of bouquets into various vases around the Atlas so he didn’t have to deal with the flowers himself. Apparently, most people found him too difficult to approach with gifts in person, which he was beyond grateful for.

Matt rolled his eyes, knowing all too well that Shiro had found more than a few surprises on his doorstep. “Don’t be such a Valentine’s Scrooge,” he teased, jabbing his elbow into Shiro’s side. He waited for some sort of comeback, his bright smile faltering when Shiro didn’t give one. He began to pluck nervously at one of the several roses in his lap, dropping the petals aside on his leg, “so… Do you have plans for tomorrow? Anything special for the big day?” He wondered aloud, a hint of hopefulness in his voice.

“Nothing at all,” Shiro admitted. He thought of asking about Matt’s plans, though, truthfully, it was the last thing he wanted to hear. Given the amount of suitors he’d seen, Matt surely had at least one date lined up.

Matt stilled, his brow furrowing and the rest of his smile fading at the response. “Nothing?” he slumped against the back of the chair, staring at the pile of plucked petals he’d made rather than at the man next to him, “what about that secret admirer? You’re not going to meet them?”

“I’ve got a lot of work to do,” Shiro lied, vaguely gesturing to his pad, which displayed a project he hoped Matt wouldn’t notice had already been completed.

“But a secret admirer! How can you not be into that?”

“I’m not interested,” he said pointedly.

Matt sighed, and dropped the now petal-less flower stem to his lap. “You’re really gonna break a guy’s heart and not even acknowledge it, aren’t you?”

“Matt, It’s not my fault Valentine’s day is a yearly reminder that people don’t always feel the same about you,” He snipped, catching even himself off guard. Heat smoldered up into Shiro’s cheeks, and he sincerely hoped that hadn’t been too revealing of a statement.

“Oh,” Matt squeaked out, absolutely catching a deeper meaning to the words. “Well. This is awkward.”

“I’m sorry, I just… I’m going to head out,” Shiro decided, hoping to avoid any further embarrassment. 

“Wait!” Matt clung to Shiro’s arm as he tried to get away, “you can’t just say that and walk away!”

“I really,  _ really _ don’t want to talk about this right now... “ He pleaded, knowing he was unbelievably unprepared to confess now of all times.

Reluctantly, Matt let go, frowning as Shiro didn’t hesitate in walking away.

Every step Shiro took towards his cabin was another pang of regret, another jolt of frustration for his absolute inability to do  _ anything _ about his feelings beyond sabotaging himself. He ignored the bouquet of flowers laid in front of his room, stepping over them before slamming the button that would lock the metal door behind him. He covered his face with his hands, groaning as his fingers dug painfully into his scalp. He’d lost track now of how many years it had been since he’d starting falling for Matt. How many years he’d been through since they stayed up late into the night, studying ice drilling techniques and dreaming about the depths of space, oblivious to how far out they’d really end up. How long had it been since they spent every hour of the day together, watching the stars through a window with Earth just a blue dot in the distance but still there, still safe, still something they took for granted while they laughed about the possibility of aliens. Matt had always been there, long before Shiro thought of him as more than a friend. Then, it had all happened so fast, at some point he’d fallen in love, and every wave of bittersweet nostalgia he felt with Matt around only made it worse. “I’m an idiot,” he said aloud to himself, leaning back against the cold door.

“Yeah, you sure are,” a familiar voice sassed.

Shiro’s breath caught in his throat. Immediately, he sprung into a combat-readied stance, bringing his hands down in fists by his chin, only to freeze at the sight. “Adam?” He squeaked out in disbelief.

There was no mistaking him. It was the very same face, even if Shiro hadn’t seen it in years. The same dark, choppy hair, the same molten brown eyes. Even the glasses, the uniform! Just the same as he’d seen them last, only, now, Adam was… less than opaque. He hovered, just inches from the ground, the slightest bit pale with transparency. While Shiro was unwilling to believe it, he was sure he was staring at a ghost.

“You’re…You’re Dead. You are dead,” he sputtered, hands still ready to throw a blow at a moment’s notice.

“Oh, how eloquently put.” Adam deadpanned, folding his arms across his chest, “you know the worst part about being dead, Takashi? I can’t bang my head against the wall when I watch how stupid you’re being. It just goes right through!” He turned his back on Shiro, drifting to the coffee table nearby where unwanted Valentine’s gifts were heaped. He plucked a deep violet envelope from the pile, apparently from ‘ _ A Secret Admirer,’  _ though the handwriting was difficult to decipher. If anything, that alone should have given it away. Adam silently wished he could breath, just to let out a heavy exhale at Shiro’s obliviousness. “You didn’t even open these.”

Shiro watched in horror, his blood running colder at each movement Adam made. Slowly, he crept forward, following the ghost over to the table. “You can’t be here. You’re dead. You’re very dead,” he spoke shakily, trying to convince himself the words were true.

“Well now you’re just being rude,” Adam scoffed, “don’t you know it’s rude to keep pointing that out?”

“No! How would I even- no, nope. This isn’t happening.” He shook his head, rubbing at his temples with his eyes shut tightly. When he reopened them, he was disheartened to find Adam still very much present. “You’re not real,” Shiro insisted, jamming an accusatory finger through the frigid air of Adam’s chest. He dug into his pocket, pulling out his phone, “I’m calling security.”

“Great! That’s a great idea, let me help.” He snatched the phone from Shiro’s hands, his own ethereal fingers passing right through Shiro’s flesh. He brought the phone to his ear, and spoke in a deep, mocking voice somewhat reminiscent of Shiro’s, “hi, officer? Yeah, my dead ex-boyfriend’s ghost is in my room. Can you send the Winchester brothers over? Or maybe one of the Ghostbusters? Egon Spengler would be fantastic.” He tossed the phone back into Shiro’s hands, and returned to his normal tone, “do you still have a crush on Spengler? Or was that just the start of your crush on Matt,” he teased, “you’ve got quite the type.”

Shiro narrowed his eyes, adding embarrassment to the barrage of emotions this supernatural encounter was causing him. “Why are you here? How are you here? What do you want!” Shiro demanded, barking out the questions one after another with no time for answers in between.

“Alright, I’m going to explain this real simple,” Adam drew out his words, speaking slowly in a falsely sweet tone, “your love life? Is an absolute disaster. You haven’t been on a date in what, ten years? Now, here you are, the night before Valentines day, with a whole pile of valentines, half of them from the same  _ secret admirer _ who has been anything  _ but _ secret, and you won’t even look at them. So I’m here, from the great beyond or wherever it’s easiest for you to imagine me coming from, to help you stop being stupid about this.”

“You’re here to help me fix my love life?” Shiro couldn’t help himself, and laughed at the pure insanity of the situation, “you’re the ghost of the guy who dumped me! How are you going to help me? Why would you even want to?”

Adam scowled at him, clenching his fists in what would surely be a white-knuckled grip if such a thing existed for spirits. “God, I know you’ve read A Christmas Carol, this can’t be that hard of a concept for you! Do you want my help or do you want to die alone?”

“Oh no, you are not A Christmas Carol-ing me, you spectral asshole,” Shiro growled back. “A lot of people hate Valentine’s day, that doesn’t make us all Scrooges!”

“You used to love Valentine’s day, Takashi! You asked me out on Valentine’s day, or do you not remember?”

Shiro crossed his arms over his chest, stubbornly turning his head away. He remembered, though it seemed in his best interest to deny it. “It was a long time ago,” he mumbled unconvincingly.

Adam’s scowl twisted into a wicked smirk, “then allow me to refresh your memory.” He closed the gap between himself and Shiro, grabbing the other man’s shoulders.

Shiro gasped, too caught off guard by the absolutely freezing contact to notice the room blur around him. He jerked away, stumbling backwards when he finally caught the change in scenery. He was struck by a wave of nausea, nearly collapsing, “what did you just do?”

“Time travel.”

“Time travel?!” Shiro choked out over the overwhelming urge to throw up. He took in his surroundings, quickly recognizing they were no longer in the Atlas. He stared at the flight simulator now in front of him, brand new and devoid of the dents, scratches and chipped paint he’d come to be all too familiar with. He placed a palm on the smooth metal of the door, flinching as quiet laughter and a whispered  _ shh! _  broke through the silence. Shiro turned, catching sight of two cadets sneaking their way through the hall. “Oh my god. You didn’t,” he wheezed out, looking around for somewhere to hide as the two teenagers got closer.

“They can’t see us, you’re fine,” Adam assured.

“It’s  _ us! _ ” He yelped, fisting his hands into his hair as he watched the past play out in front of him. He watched a much younger version of himself, no more than a teenager with shaggy black hair, a scarless face and bright braces-covered smile drag along his at the time much taller best friend, a similarly young and awkward looking Adam. The two teens passed right through him to get to the simulator, not even noticing as they knocked the breath from Shiro’s lungs. It took a good moment for him to recover, as he patted his torso to ensure he hadn’t been permanently damaged by it. He looked to Adam’s ghost, eyes wide in shock, “this is… this is the past. You brought me to the past.”

The spirit nodded, relieved Shiro was finally starting to catch on.

“Put me back!”

“You idiot, just watch!” Adam hissed, relief vanishing. “Come on!” He caught hold of Shiro’s wrist, dragging him inside to witness their past selves.

The younger Shiro plopped himself down into the pilot’s chair, folding one leg over the other and clasping his hands in his lap. “I suppose you’re wondering why I’ve asked you here,” he said with a devilish grin.

“Yeah, I am, considering you have a date in an hour,” younger Adam complained, glaring at his best friend, “you better not be trying to set me up with someone, I’ll hate you and him.”

“Why don’t you just take a seat?” Shiro offered and gestured to the turned-away co-pilot’s chair beside him.

With a low growl, Adam marched over and grabbed the back of the chair, spinning it towards himself to sit down. Immediately he stopped, seeing that the seat was already quite occupied with a bouquet of colorful lilies, an assortment of candy hearts and a sign across the backrest that read  _ ‘Be more than my co-pilot?’  _ in large, glittery red letters. Adam flushed, nearly fogging his glasses with the heat burning his cheeks, “Is this…?”

“For you. Yeah.”

“But… You said you had a date!”

“Well, hopefully with you,” young Shiro explained. He forced himself to keep his eyes on Adam’s, pushing through the embarrassment and anxiety threatening to overwhelm him. “I really  _ really _ like you, Adam. Will you go out with me?”

After a stunned silence, Adam grabbed Shiro by the collar, pulling him up from the pilot’s chair and into a crushing hug. He completely ignored the other’s yelp of surprise. “You’re such a dork… But I really really like you too.”

From the back of the simulator, present day Shiro couldn’t help but smile. “I was smooth and you know it,” he whispered. But, the weight of reality crushed his chest as he felt dreadfully homesick. “We used to be so happy.”

“You were a hopeless romantic,” Adam teased, with a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “So why do you hate Valentine’s so much now? I know it’s not my fault.”

“How do you know that?”

“You’re telling me your Valentine’s day in space with Matt didn’t go well?”

Shiro considered it, trying to remember the holiday he’d spent on the Kerberos mission. He knew it had been his second Valentine’s day without Adam, though it was hard to recall. “I don’t remember a lot from then,” he admitted. He stepped away as Adam moved in closer, lightly swatting at the ghostly hand reaching for him, “wait, no, I’m going to throw up if you time travel me again!”

“You don’t get a choice,” Adam snipped, swatting back at Shiro, “come on!”

Reluctantly, Shiro held still, this time closing his eyes as a chill surrounded him, and his stomach lurched at the unfamiliar feeling. He concentrated on keeping himself grounded, an extraordinarily difficult task when he was overcome by a sudden weightlessness. Matt’s voice nearby startled him.

“Shiro! Shiro come here!” Matt excitedly yelped, from just inside the room next to them.

Shiro glanced through the doorway, recognizing it to be the common room from the Kerberos shuttle. He gripped tightly to the wall, using it to guide his way in. He wasn’t sure how he felt about being on the shuttle again, a place filled with so many precious moments he could barely recall before it all turned to a waking nightmare. He floated rather than stepped inside the common room, flooded with warm memories as he saw Matt, with his short hair and small frame struggling to cover the large window that looked out into the stars.

“Come on, get over here!” Matt called out again, a dimpled grin plastered across his face. His hair stuck out every which way, even more so than normal with the lack of gravity to keep it down, and the sides of his nose still had small imprints from the glasses he’d ditched not so long ago.

Again, Shiro had the wind knocked out of him as someone passed through him, though he recovered from the shock quicker this time. His past self was older than the previous one, of course. He looked much more similar to how he appeared now, yet still so different. It couldn’t have been more than a few years ago, but Shiro studied his jet black hair, his smiling face and bright eyes and could hardly believe he’d looked like that so recently. If he could see his reflection next to this younger version of himself, he’d swear there was at least a thirty year gap between them.

His younger self drifted over to Matt, eyebrow quirked curiously, “you know, you’re really not big enough to cover that window, right?” He teased, cocking his head to see whatever it was Matt was hiding.

Matt shook his head, “doesn’t matter, I covered it enough! Close your eyes!” He waited for Shiro to follow the order, then lightly pushed himself off the wall. He circled around to Shiro’s back and placed his head on the other man’s shoulder, close enough for their cheeks to press together. “A  _ little  _ to the left,” he mumbled under his breath, shuffling them both into position. “Okay, Open up! Happy Valentine’s day!”

The younger Shiro did as told, not quite knowing to expect. He studied the window, which Matt had drawn all over in erasable marker, connecting the countless stars into his own constellations, “Matt, this is fantastic,” Shiro marveled, looking over them all. Dozens of hearts in all different sizes and orientations, a few five pointed stars, a crude rocket ship, and two shapes Shiro couldn’t quite make out. “What’s that one?” he asked, pointing to a jagged form next to the biggest heart.

“It’s your weird hair floof, duh,” Matt snickered, wrapping his arms around Shiro’s chest from behind, and keeping their faces pressed together.

Shiro kicked back playfully at one of Matt’s legs, then pointed to the shape on the other side of the large heart, “what about that oval? Just circling a bunch of stars?”

“Those are my freckles.”

“That’s not a constellation, that’s cheating!”

“Hey, I’m trying to be sweet! There’s not a lot to work with in space for making gifts, you know,” he laughed along with Shiro, unwrapping his arms from around him to push him away, “besides, I bet you totally didn’t get me anything! Which means I win.”

Shiro grabbed onto the edge of the window to keep himself from floating too far, and grabbed onto Matt’s shirt to keep them near together, “Matt, it’s not a contest.”

“You only say that because I’m winning.”

“Alright, fine, I owe you a Valentine’s present. As soon as we get home, I’ll bring you a huge bouquet of flowers, alright?”

“Ooh, make them daffodils. And don’t forget the candy.”

“You’re awfully high maintenance, you know.”

“Hey! Do you want to win my heart or not?” Matt teased, lost in another fit of giggles.

Bashfully, Shiro looked away, still smiling so widely his face was beginning to ache. When he gathered the courage to look back, Matt’s was just as flushed as him, and his hair had started floating into the way of his face as it usually did. Gently, Shiro ran both of his hands through Matt’s hair, brushing it all back into place. “Yeah, I do,” he said softly, bringing his hands down to cup Matt’s face.

Matt gasped quietly, placing his own hand over one of Shiro’s. He leaned forward, letting his eyes flutter shut.

Adam couldn’t help but snort as Matt’s father came into the room, wrecking the moment and causing both the young astronauts to blush even deeper as they scrambled away from each other. “That was almost disgustingly cute,” he remarked, looking over to the present Shiro to see his reaction.

He was looking away, no longer paying attention to his younger self, instead staring at the floor. “Take me back,” Shiro whispered, “I don’t want to see any more.”

Adam softened, the reaction not exactly what he was expecting. He took one last look back at the Kerberos crew, taking solemn note of the whiteboard hung near them with  _ ‘9 Days to Kerberos!’  _ scrawled across it in messy red letters. Less than two weeks. He reached out and clasped a hand on Shiro’s shoulder, the ship around them fading away as they came back to Shiro’s room in the Atlas.

Shiro stumbled to the armchair next to his Valentine-coated coffee table and collapsed into it, feeling incredibly queasy from jumping around the timeline, and incredibly hollow at having gotten back such a bittersweet memory. “I’m done with this. Go away,” he pleaded, “you’re not helping me. You’re just showing me everything I can’t have.”

“Did we even just watch the same memory?” Adam scoffed, bewildered on how Shiro could take it so poorly, “Takashi, Matt felt the same about you! He still does!”

“No he doesn’t, okay? He’s got a dozen guys fawning over him, what good am I?” He slumped down further into the chair, staring at the pile of candies and cards in front of him. “You want to know why I hate Valentine’s this year? It’s because everything has changed, and I can’t get back what you’re showing me. I’ve lost enough, and I can’t risk losing any more.”

“What do you mean you can’t take a risk, your entire life has been risks!”

“And look where that got me! I’ve got one arm, white hair, some serious mental issues, and my dead ex-fiance’s ghost telling me I’m going to die alone.” He hauled himself back up, walking straight through Adam to get to the door.

Adam flinched, taking quite a bit of offense to the action, “Rude! And everything except that last one was part of saving the universe, so I don’t think that’s really an argument in your favor.” He followed Shiro to the door, “we’re not done yet, you’ve still got the present and future to deal with.”

“No! I’ve made up my mind, and this is not going to happen.” He pinched the bridge of his nose, clenching his eyes with the hope that, maybe this time it would make Adam disappear. He turned away completely, facing the door and slamming the button that would open it. “Please, just go away!” he begged as the door slid open. Only after hearing a small, offended noise did he reopen his eyes to see Matt just outside the room, hand still in place to knock. His eyes darted from Matt’s flushed face, to the bouquet of deep purple and soft white flowers in his hands. Shiro stood motionless, blinking as the cogs of his mind churned out nothing but garbage and panic.

Matt lodged himself into the doorway, making sure Shiro couldn’t close it on him, “wait, please don’t tell me to go away, can’t we talk?”

Adam yelled out a groan of frustration, “oh my god I wish he could see me, for fuck’s sake, Takashi, tell him how you feel! He came here with flowers!”

Shiro felt a cold sweat drip down his back, and fought not to react to Adam’s ghost screaming next to him, “Matt. Now is really not a good time.”

Matt gave him an annoyed huff, “don’t be a dick, I know you’re not busy! Just listen to me.” Completely oblivious to the irritated spirit watching them, he shoved the flowers into Shiro’s arms, “I know we don’t feel the same about each other, okay? But… Please don’t be mad at me.”

“So… you know.” Shiro’s eyes darted to Adam for a brief second, internally screaming  _ ‘I told you so,’  _ at him.

“I mean, yeah,” Matt mumbled. He moved to tug at his ponytail, a nervous habit he’d developed, only to stop short upon remembering it wasn’t there anymore. He settled for wringing his hands instead, clearing his throat before he continued. “You made it kinda obvious with the whole ‘people don’t always feel the same about you’ thing, which was, uh, kinda brutal, I gotta admit. Like, yeah, maybe I shouldn’t have done the whole secret admirer thing, but I thought you’d like it! You were always into mushy romance stuff, you know?”

Shiro short circuited, gaping at the confession. He thought of the entire pile of letters he’d received, he hadn’t so much as given any of them a second glance after throwing them aside. A tremendous amount of guilt weighed down on him, too heavy to think or speak through. Matt had taken his words the  _ opposite _ of how he’d meant them.

“Can you just, say something? You know? Anything? Like, that you don’t hate me and we can still be friends and at some point when we’re both over this I can jokingly flirt with you still? Maybe?” Matt rambled on, his heart pounding harder with each second of silence they shared.

“I don’t hate you!” Shiro rushed to say, nearly tripping over the words, “Matt, I promise I don’t hate you.”

“Alright, cool,” Matt managed, forcing his lips into half a smile, “I’ll… I’ll see you around, then.” He awkwardly waved goodbye, quite unsure of what to do with himself as he slipped out of the doorway.

“Yeah…” Shiro rasped, watching him take off down the hall. He slammed the door button, closing and locking it, dreading what Adam had to say about the encounter.

Adam was, as expected, livid. He was sure he was going to die. He was absolutely positive that he, a ghost, an already non-living entity, was going to drop dead. “What the fuck was that?” He finally screeched, “I just watched his heart break! What’s wrong with you!”

“It’s just… Better like this, okay?” Shiro sighed, slumping against the wall and letting his bouquet of flowers fall aside.

“How is this better?” Adam ranted on, “you’re in love with a guy who’s been sending you love letters, and he just came to your door to confess to you, and you think it’s better if you break both of your hearts? How much brain damage do you have!”

“Well I was in love with you, too! And look how that turned out, we broke up, barely talked to each other, then both of us died and now we’re just arguing!” Shiro shot back, his already non-existent patience with the situation running even thinner, “I can’t do that to Matt. I can’t lose him, too!”

“Oh my god, do you have any idea how dumb this is? I’m going to haunt you for the rest of your life! Do you want to see what’s going to happen to you?”

“I know for a fact you can’t take me into the future, I’ve had to deal with Slav long enough to know about alternate realities and timeline variation! Go ahead and try it!” Shiro dared, not the least bit frightened.

“Okay, fine,” Adam spat, “I can’t take you into the future, but you know where I can take you?”

A flash of fear shot through Shiro’s eyes as Adam reached out for him again. In an instant, he found himself in the cool, marbled hall of the Altean castle, just a few feet away from Coran, laying a bouquet in front of King Alfor’s monument. In another burst of movement, he found himself in hard rain, standing ankle deep in the freezing mud behind a headstone, with Krolia knelt down in front of it. The graveyard was whisked off, and his vision blacked out for a second, but he came back to see the garrison memorial, hundreds of names tacked up on a wall, with a sea of flowers laid against it. As if he didn’t feel sick enough from warping through space, the world fell away. As he came back to solid ground, again in icy rain, Shiro fell to his hands and knees, splattering mud around him as he heaved.

Adam was unaffected by the jumps, still just as infuriated as before. “Do you have any idea how lucky you are? That you made it out of this war alive, and that the person you’re in love with made it too? Not a lot of people got that, Takashi!” He dropped down next to Shiro, uncaring about the mud and pouring rain. “You know what’s going to happen? You’re going to bottle your feelings up, and you’re going to waste your chance until it’s gone, and one day, you’re going to be leaving flowers on a grave, and you’re going to regret everything you never got the chance to say!”

Shiro sucked in a few more deep breaths, the cold doing nothing to ease the sickness in his stomach. He finally found it in himself to look up, coming face to face with his own name carved into a headstone. After the shot of terror made it through his heart, he took note of the date of death. It wasn’t the future, he knew that. He was still in the present, staring at the empty grave he’d been given when the Garrison had declared him dead. He looked to Adam, surprised to see a few spectral tears sliding down beneath his glasses. “You used to come here. To my grave,” he realized.

Adam sniffed, his hands knocking his glasses out of place as he wiped away at his eyes, “of course I did. I thought you were dead. I thought you died, and I still had a lot left to say to you!”

“Then… Go ahead,” Shiro gulped, sure that whatever it was, it wouldn’t be good.

Adam kept his eyes fixed to the headstone, letting out a short, bitter laugh at the irony of it. “I just… I wanted things to work out between us. And I was so focused on making things work out, that it was just. Forced. Neither of us were happy anymore.”

“I was selfish,” Shiro mumbled, thinking he knew where this was going.

“Knock it off!” Adam griped, awfully sick of Shiro making bad assumptions, “no, you weren’t! We just wanted different things, and it wasn’t something you can just compromise on. I’m not sorry we dated, but I’d break up with you again in a heartbeat.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“Shut up! I’m not done,” he snapped again, determined not to stop until he’d gotten everything off his chest. “I’m not sorry we broke up. I’m sorry that I pretended to stop caring. I’m sorry that I pretended you didn’t matter to me anymore, because you do. You always mattered to me. And… I still want you to be happy, okay? I want you to follow your heart again, like you always did, even if it seemed like the dumb thing to do.”

Shiro reached out, about to touch Adam’s shoulder before stopping short, realizing it might go right through. He took another deep breath, and another look at his own name, at a grave he’d dodged too many times to count. “You’re right,” he solemnly admitted. “I’m sorry, Adam. You’re right…” He froze, caught off guard as ghostly arms wrapped around him, pulling him into a shockingly solid hug. He had the sense to return it, gripping tightly as the rain ceased, and the damp grass turned to a solid metal floor.

“Don’t be stupid, okay?” Adam murmured, tears still making their way down his face, and vanishing as they hit Shiro’s shoulder, “promise me you’ll try to be yourself again. And not just for Valentine’s day.”

"Okay," Shiro nodded, his breath shaking as his own eyes stung with tears, “I promise.”

“Takashi, promise me one more thing.”

* * *

 

Shiro rapped his knuckles hard against the door, much harder than he needed to, but he couldn’t help his nerves getting to him. He hadn’t changed, he was still sopping wet, covered in grass and caked on mud, knocking on a door at a probably rude hour of the night, again and again.

Finally, the door was flung open, revealing a rather sniffly, tired looking Matt. He blanched, incredibly self conscious of his appearance. His eyes were puffy and red, making it clear he’d been crying, and he was far from properly dressed with a pair of rocket-ship print pajama pants he’d found in his old bedroom, no shirt, and a green lion robe that had been too big for his sister. He then took note of Shiro’s appearance, which was somehow even worse. “You look like you just crawled out of a grave…”

“That’s… not too far off,” Shiro admitted. He brushed aside Matt’s confused expression, too focused on the knots his stomach was tying itself into. “I need to talk to you.”

“That’s nice, but it’s midnight, and I’m  _ really _ busy crying and eating chocolate,” he grumbled sarcastically, the slightest bit irked to be interrupted by Shiro after being rejected by him a few hours back.

Shiro brought his hand out from behind his back, shoving a metal fist full of bright yellow daffodils into Matt’s arms, “these are for you.” He took Matt’s stunned silence as opportunity to dig through his shoulder bag, pulling out a bag of peanut butter hearts, “and these. I didn’t forget the candy.”

“Shiro… Why are you doing this?” Matt whined, certain the gifts were out of pity and nothing more.

“Because you spent hours in the common room making constellations for me, and I never made good on my promise. I promised you a big bouquet of daffodils, and candy.”

Matt blinked, taken aback by the answer. “You remember that?”

“Yes, I do. Because that’s how you said I could win your heart. That’s what I’m trying to do.”

“But… but earlier,” Matt stammered, not at all following the situation, "you-"

“I know, and I can explain, but I’ve been wanting to do this for years.” Shiro took a deep breath, shaking away the last of his nerves before taking another step forward. He brought his hands up to cup Matt’s face, tilting his head up before locking their lips together.

Matt more or less squeaked into the kiss. His mind might as well have shut down, all except the small portion that made him grab onto Shiro’s shoulders, tilt his head and melt into feeling of rough lips against his own, of cold hands holding him close, of the distant sound yet close smell of heavy rain drowning the rest of the world away.

The second he pulled back, Shiro pressed his forehead against Matt’s. “I’m in love with you,” he breathed, his heart threatening to pound it’s way right through his rib cage.

“I love you too.” Matt grinned, laughing as he wiped away some of the mud caked onto Shiro’s face, “what the hell have you been doing, though?”

"It's... A long story."

"I want to hear it."

* * *

 

Shiro snuck through the halls, like a teenager worried he’d be caught somewhere he shouldn't be. The lights glowed dimly, as they always did in the garrison past curfew, when not too many officers or students would be walking about. He peeked around the corner, ensuring no one else was in the room when he arrived. Certain that the room was empty, he slowly padded forward.

“Alright, I promised I’d be here,” he said, softly, though his voice still echoed through the empty room. He searched around, expectantly, and found himself still alone. He sighed, considering that maybe it  _ had  _ just been a fever dream, but nevertheless he stepped further in to the room. “I really won’t appreciate it if you jump out and scare me. Ghost or not, it’s a dick move,” he warned.

No response.

He hovered his hand over the memorial wall, stopping and placing his fingers on the small plaque that read  _ ‘Adam W.’ _ Directly below it, he set a vase of colorful lilies, and sat on the floor.

“I don’t… I don’t know if you’re here,” he started, still scanning the room for anything strange, and finding nothing. “But… You wanted me to visit. And to tell you how everything went. And… It went really well,” he admitted, finding his mouth stuck in a smile. Even with nothing but silence in return. He stayed, and talked, and rambled on, on the off chance that he was being heard. Eventually he glanced to the clock, noticing how much time had passed until he’d run out of words. “I guess that’s it, then.” He mumbled.

Silence.

Still, he smiled at the vase of lilies on the floor. “You were right. I know I hate to admit it, but you were right. You usually always were,” he sighed. Shiro picked himself up from the floor, and took one last look around, rather disheartened to see nothing out of the ordinary before he turned to leave.

_ “Thank you.” _

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!! Comments/kudos are much appreciated <3  
> Big thanks as always to @windedleaves for listening to me gripe endlessly about the WEIRDEST AU ideas ever. Seriously. Y'all don't even know what he puts up with.  
> Happy Valentine's day!


End file.
